By Sophia Moreno
Staff Writer
I used to dread hearing the slamming of the door as my parents argued in the kitchen. Growing up, my parents often fought, arguing about every imperfection. When I was seven, my parents decided to file for divorce.
With the cut of my parent’s split still freshly bleeding, Christmas rolled around the corner. My mom, too busy with finding the right attorney and stressing about taking care of two kids on her own, wasn’t able to keep up the extra work of playing Santa Claus. That year, Santa never came to town. Not only was 2017 the year of my family splitting, it was also the year my folklore fantasies disappeared.
The topic of divorce among teens is not uncommon. According to the National Library of Medicine, 45.8% of children reach 17 still living with both married parents, leaving the other 52.4% subject to family separation.
Hearing from other kids with separated parents, I quickly learned that Christmas was also extremely stressful for them. When the actual day arrives, we are torn between who to spend our day with, but whenever we make that decision, it ends up excruciating for the other parent. If we plan on seeing both parents that same day, it is extremely exhausting running around.
We frantically try to find peace in our vacation but also feel the need to make the most memories with our parents.
With this in mind, we should be more understanding when it comes to talking about Christmas with our friends and peers.
Constantly hearing other kids with non-divorced parents say that there’s “no place like home,” I began realizing there was no home for me as a child of divorce. My mom’s house was entirely new. My dad’s house was barren and empty, a reminder of what I had in the past. It felt wrong to have Christmas at either house, both unfamiliar to me.
Not only was there no place I could call home, but there was also the reminder that my Christmas would never be the same. While my friends rejoiced with their family, watching movies, making cookies and playing board games, I felt empty and heartbroken during the holidays. It was a constant reminder of everything I lost.
Many students who cannot relate might assume that kids with divorced parents get double the presents, double the fun, double the love and double the winter activities. Unfortunately, that is not the reality we face. Looking past the materialistic aspect, you’ll find us wishing for our parents back, for our families to be whole again. Even after seven years, I still stress about what could have been.
Knowing not everyone has similar circumstances, we must keep in mind the fact that not everyone has the same loving family as others. Putting yourself in someone else’s position can help you understand what they go through every year.
During the holiday season, not everyone gets to celebrate Christmas traditionally, but without the constant reminder of a “perfect” Christmas, I am able to try and accept my family circumstances.
Christmas isn’t always the most wonderful time of the year.